Ode To A Patio Rebirth!

Patricia Garrett , a friend and fellow warrior wrote this wonderful piece to me regarding the makeover of the patio/garden connected to her home in LA. I was so impressed that I wanted you to read it.
Enjoy and learn!

Hi Denny!

The neglect began the day the apricot tree, which had been the source

of so many delicious apricot daqueris died. I didn't even want to see

where it had once stood, shading a corner of our patio. The potted

plants that I had lovingly placed around the patio had also either died
or just managed to survive with no attention. This sorry state of affairs

continued for over 2 years aided by the fact we were never home for

more than 8 or 10 days at a time during the past few summers. I'd

just have the opportunity to catch up with things inside, when it was

time to pack up and leave again. Ahhh, but then THIS summer came

along. We had arranged to travel less and spend almost the entire

summer at home. I walked outside one day in May and was shocked at

the state of disrepair. I had simply stopped seeing. This was the

summer to open my eyes. (Love this, Pat!)

Since I had read What Color Is Your Slipcover, I had a file with pictures
of gardens and patios that called to me. It was time to use it!

The next step was a call to a woman who had been featured in the
LA Times garden section. After "Hello.", I simply blurted out," I have
a back yard in Brentwood that needs your help!" She laughed and
turned out to be just the right person. As I was doing this without
the enthusiastic agreement of Dave it was necessary to keep the
$$$$ to a minimum and the impact tothe maximum. Every decorator's
nightmare! But we did it. Instead of removing all the cracked concrete,
we had the cracks jackhammered and inserted black stones into the
now wider spaces. We removed a wall, added a water fountain, a fire
cauldron and replanted the pots, most with succulents. Before the work
was begun I thought about what I wanted most from the space. My
answer was tranquility and romance. Once the major work was
completed, I quickly set about seeing to those aspects. I found lanterns
to hang, mirrors which reflect the sun and make "fireflies" dance all
patio, amber lights to swag and even a chandelier with real candles
over the dining table.

After viewing Momma Mia with some friends I decided I had the perfect

setting for a party ala the film. I ordered Greek food, set up one

long table laid out for 24 guests and the fun began. Each guest was

charmed by the setting and my patio was officially reborn. It is now a

major effort to drag myself out of my hammock and into the real world.

I make it a priority to spend part of each day there, either reading,

working with the plants or blowing bubbles for my grandkids. I am

once again so very happy to have a back patio that has become a
place of peace in my life.

Love, Pat

Getting Past Overwhelm

Yesterday I worked with a client who is planning a renovation that begins with a new kitchen. Stunned by catalogues that included pages and pages of cabinet door images, floor tile images, plumbing fixture illustrations etc. etc. she found herself more frightened than happy about the project. Her husband was leaving most of the style choices to her, and she didn’t have a clue where to start. Her builder called me into action. “See if you can help,” he directed.

She is a mother of a 19 month old, so getting to the job of cutting out pictures to reflect her style didn’t get done. I believe so deeply in the need to get a handle on one’s style before ever starting purchases, so I suggested that our first hour together be devoted to her going through the magazines and the two of us evaluating what was there speaking to her. She agreed out of desperation (I think) and while she went through magazines I wandered the house returning from time to time and checking in. It was a great process. She knew readily when she looked at a picture, whether she liked it or not. Combining what I saw in the house, I began to put lots of possibilities to her for consideration and affirmation. We became a fabulous team so quickly.

“I’m seeing no focus or pattern on the floor in any of your pictures!” I said. She looked and agreed.

‘Notice how there is no shine on the floor, but lots on the counter and above.“ I showed her.

Her house was filled with color. I asked her about colors she loved, about whether she loved real art as opposed to prints, and whether she loved collage. I noticed how often there were pendent lights in her pictures. She was having fun, and learning a lot about herself with this organized way of selecting.

The crowning moment was when she pulled out that cabinet catalogue again and saw the 75 images begging to be chosen. “This, she said is when I get overwhelmed. And it happens in the midst of meetings and everyone waiting for my choices.”

I methodically showed her each kitchen picture she had pulled out of that pile of magazines. Show me the cabinet image in the catalogue that represents the cabinets in this picture. IT WAS ALWAYS THE SAME IMAGE.

Now her smile was broad. “Do you see how consistent you are?” I said. She nodded.

“Do you know how easy it is going to finally be when you have to choose?”

“I think I do.” She said.

We continued for a short time to keep evaluating and narrowing into who she was, and what would work best so that she was daily inspired by her environment. The process took just an hour for now, and had her ready for the big guns when she had to be confidant that A was better than B for her kitchen. I left my happy client with the assignment to “Do some more.” She promised she would. And I promised myself I would insist on this hour of planning with every client that is willing, so the design, the renovation and everything in between is pure joy and success. I say this for every designer to hear, and for every client to do.

PLEASE!

This Is So Important!

This is so important!

I am just back in Pennsylvania from a trip to California and up into Malibu where my son and daughter-in-law have just bought a magnificent home overlooking the Pacific. We had many long conversations about the inner space of that home and it re-ignited that fire in me about how important it is to each have input/a voice into the process of design of the home!

When we were discussing how they were going to approach their spaces I could hear/see differences in their individual needs/preferences. One was liking it cooler and simpler, the other warmer and a bit more complex. But they have heard me enough to know they must find their consensus in order to begin. They will be working with a designer in California, so they now need to find their words, their common ground to be able to communicate to this professional just what it is they as individuals and they as a couple want. This will allow each of them on a daily basis to resonate deeply with their surroundings, their HOME.

We bought them piles of magazines. They will each go through them individually cutting out all the images, colors, shapes, essences that make them feel SO GOOD! (See the chapter on “Finding Your Common Ground” in my book). Then they’ll exchange their pile of selections and each go through the other’s collection of favorites. They’ll extract from each other’s pile their individual favorites again. Now they’ve created a third pile, which is their consensus. That third pile of pictures is their key to both of them loving their home.”.

To use this process they must take careful note of just what it is they like AND WHAT THE OTHER IS LIKING! They need to talk about what their current life is, and how they need to orient and organize their space to fit that lifestyle. If quality time is spent doing this work and seeing all the characteristics, talking about them, and understanding them, then they’ll be able to talk to their professional in a more profound way. Then he/she can transpose it all onto to the space of their beloved cocoon, and it will guarantee surroundings that represent both of them, deeply. When they open the door from a long day out in the external world, the nest will welcome each of them on the heart level and bring them solace and joy.

As we spoke I could clearly see the metaphor. If two persons can come together and find their agreement, the oneness that does live in both, they will have found the place from which they can live their life together with profound compassion and understanding. If countries, states, communities can do this also, then we all will feel at home on the planet and be able to live in total compassion and understanding of each other.

When one or the other suppresses who they truly are, or ignores their truths, then intimacy, knowing, possibility and true transparency is lost, and equality and balance are not possible. Do the work! Take the time! Bring your hearts and your souls to the table of dialogue, respect what each wants and needs so the intention for happiness and peace while living together has much more possibility. You’ll be teaching everyone on the planet how to live together.

They Decided To Move "Within" Their Home

They decided to move “within” their home!

I got a call. “ We’re so excited! We’re moving the master bedroom downstairs, my office into the guest bedroom, creating a family room where my office was and making the old master bedroom the guest bedroom!” they said.

“WOW!” I said. “That’s powerful stuff.”

“Yep. Come as soon as you can. We need to talk."

I got over there pronto. I was excited. I knew they had just moved a beloved business out of the house, one of them had been through a huge heart transformation, and they’d been visiting retirement centers to decide whether to sell and go, or to stay. So, you can see that this news was big and powerful. It turns out that the deer grazing outside the windows, the sun streaming through all day, a new kitchen just one year old, and this new essence without the business was just so dear and therefore had won out over security, safe planning and the advice of many.

I was not one of the many saying “Sell.” They had consulted me during their process, and I had encouraged taking the route of doing what felt fabulous and powerful to their lives now (are you surprised?) I don’t think I was the only one touting that formula, but I was so ecstatic to hear their decision.

We are now deep in the process of creating, shuffling, and rearranging. I wish you could see it. The home is very Scandinavian in appearance, lots of windows looking out onto woods and fields, a deck shooting out into the trees. Their driveway is a bear when icy, but they can choose to sit tight until it thaws. Nice!

Well, the master bedroom will now be a room 16x20 square feet looking out into the woods. The bathroom is a nice size, which is getting new tile, and fantastic glass bowls for sinks. A door is being added to open into large closets that used to be the “coat rooms.” They’re choosing very daring colors and application, and they took up the wall-to-wall carpet to expose the wonderful maple wood floor. They told me they feel the space is so sexy!

Well, in a market that is less than booming, a “move within” is a fabulous choice, and especially if you’re in favor of doing what the heart desires. I suggest that it be the path we all take - no matter what!